Post by Leon Foster on Jan 3, 2011 6:21:37 GMT -5
It had been several hours now since Leonora had returned to the Castle from Drakborough, and even longer since she'd fled from the dungeons to begin with. It was hard to believe for her now that only this morning she'd been running around campus as Leon Foster, going about her normal routine. She'd come here to break away from the normal and live a life full of excitement and have more than enough chances to lose it. Of course, Leon had thought that meant having more than enough chances to die. In a way, what had happened to Leonora still meant having the chance to lose her life.
As the hours stretched across the day, the young witch still wondered whether or not that was what she wanted.
She'd said her goodbyes to Micha upon returning, and the Slytherin reminded her of their dinner date. Leonora smiled as the girl who she'd grown to possess feelings for walked away, but when she was out of sight she allowed her tears to burst forth. She'd returned to the bathroom where they'd met, and there she cried like she'd never cried before. Unlike that morning when her tears came from a mixed sense of confusion, fear, and loneliness, the ones that streamed across her face now came purely from grief. Leonora had never lost important to her in her life. Her parents and sister were alive and well, and all of the friends she'd met in her life had come and gone as expected. Her father's parents had died before she was born, and her mother's parents were still alive back in America. The girls she'd met at Salem had never really mattered to her much, and none of them had ever expected it anyway.
But seeing Micha walk away from her, dark pigtails falling behind her, was burned into her brain. Her heart beat furiously in her chest, though it felt like it was in her stomach, and blazed as if it were on fire. The nightmarish moment she'd feared and knew would come all that afternoon had finally come to pass. Leonora knew that she could see Micha again, if she remained a girl. She could go to their dinner date, and laugh and talk and spend time with her. Perhaps if they grew close enough, the other girl would somehow come to return her feelings someday.
But if she made that decision, then she could never show herself to Whites or Layne or any of the friends she'd made as Leon again. She couldn't go to classes, since it wasn't as if a Leonora Foster was enrolled as a student at Firefox University. Not that the teachers would even notice, probably, due to the constantly shifting students, let alone the teachers themselves, in the classes. Then, she'd have to somehow get into the common room to get her owl back, and then, somehow, she'd have to explain the situation to her parents.
Perhaps it meant she could never see her family again. Which meant that no matter which choice she made, she would lose someone. Either the family and friends she'd had and made through her entire life up until this point, or the first girl she'd ever come to love. In her mind, in that moment, both were equal.
She sat in the bathroom stall crying for a very long time. Surprisingly enough, during that entire stretch of time, nobody interrupted her. Not once did the door open and invite in a witch, named or nameless, to do her business or comb her hair or even just look at herself. Leonora was left alone in her own fears and tears. She preferred it, she told herself, because she did not want to risk getting even further attached to anyone else. Eventually, after she felt she'd cried all the tears she could cry, she stepped out of the stall and looked at herself in the mirror.
She was still that girl who looked back at her in the clothing store. Her clothes and robe were still the ones that Micha picked out, and the only thing that was missing was her smile and happy face. A sobbing, red-eyed one had replaced it. It was a combination of the two Leonoras, the one before the dark haired beauty had walked into her life, and the one after. She didn't know if it was smart to attempt to clean herself with her wand, knowing how poorly it responded to Leonora's commands compared to her male form and its true master. Instead, she just turned away from herself and walked out of the bathroom.
She had three choices. Hide out even longer somewhere, go upstairs to Gryffindor Tower and try to get her owl out, or go downstairs and get her stuff. Alternatively, she could go to Professor Bryane and try to fix herself. Leonora ruled out hiding out even longer, but going upstairs or going to Professor Bryane seemed too definite for now. She walked down to the dungeons, and a few male heads turned to look at her as she walked. Leonora didn't even so much as smile at them, and she imagined more than a few considered walking over to comfort her with her face like a beaten child.
She walked faster and averted her gaze. If they got the hint, they'd ignore her. If they didn't, she'd hex them.
Fortunately for them, the hint was received. She had no interference down to the Dungeons. She walked quietly back to the cell where she'd made the potion that had changed her this way, and stopped before she entered. She took a deep breath as more tears threatened to come. She remembered storming out of here what felt like an eternity ago, after Layne had confessed her feelings and offered to help fix her. There was a chance she was still inside, waiting for Leonora to return, waiting to scold her and insult her. Leonora had to be ready for confrontation. She had to be ready to decide her choice.
When she finally entered the cell, however, she found it empty. Empty all except for her books scattered across the floor, just as she'd left them, and her cauldron sitting propped up again. Her potion which had been poured all across the floor was gone, but a new brew stewed within the pot. Its smell reached Leonora's nose, and it was at first a harsh smell but after a moment it became a strong smell that reminded her much of her father. The realization that the new potion was probably the opposing potion to the one she'd made earlier came soon after.
Had Layne made this for her, knowing she would return? Guilt rose up in Leonora's chest once more. It seemed so out of character for the caustic Slytherin to have made this and just left it here, giving Leonora the choice. She would've predicted that if Layne genuinely wanted to help her at all, she would have made the potion, gathered as many people as she can, and led a charge all across Spain to find her and force her into going back to being Leon. If she didn't want to help her, Leonora would've expected Layne to just tell the whole school the truth. This, however, seemed to betray a different side of Layne Larkin.
They say that you cannot cage the person you love. That, like a bird, you must set them free, and should they truly love you, they will return to you of their own accord. Now, Leonora was presented with the choice of returning to Layne of her own accord, and drinking the potion, or simply flying away.
Return to Layne, the one who loved her, or fly away to Micha, the one whom she loved. Those were her options now.
She didn't think she could cry anymore, but the tears somehow came. Leonora stared down into the liquid, that same confusion and fear from the moment she was first changed rising up within her again. It would be so easy now just to drink the liquid before her and allow it to change her back. She could run up to the Common Room, change, and greet Whites and Layne when they got back. Leon could thank Layne, and maybe he'd grow to feel the same way about her as Leonora felt about Micha? She'd been sensitive enough to give him the choice, after all. And Micha, the cold but gentle beauty, would wait for Leonora every day until she finally realized that her friend had abandoned her. She'd get over it, though, wouldn't she? Whites would find his way to her heart, eventually, and Leon and Layne could keep the secret of Leonora to themselves forever.
She sniffed violently as a pain struck at her heart.
"You're really nice, Micha, and I think everybody should see that."
"I suppose, you are the only one to have said that, though."
Micha would go to the dinner date. She'd wait for Leonora to come. She'd wait for the only one to have seen how nice she was to come back to her. Leonora couldn't make Micha go through with that, not as Leon went on with his life unpunished by everyone except himself. To allow herself to just take Layne as 'consolation' and move on was even more horrible. She couldn't do it to Micha. She couldn't do it to the girl she loved.
So she kicked over the cauldron, allowing its contents to spill out just as the original one did. With her hands shaking, she lifted up her wand to point it at the mess. She had made her decision, and it was final. Leonora was here to stay.
As the hours stretched across the day, the young witch still wondered whether or not that was what she wanted.
She'd said her goodbyes to Micha upon returning, and the Slytherin reminded her of their dinner date. Leonora smiled as the girl who she'd grown to possess feelings for walked away, but when she was out of sight she allowed her tears to burst forth. She'd returned to the bathroom where they'd met, and there she cried like she'd never cried before. Unlike that morning when her tears came from a mixed sense of confusion, fear, and loneliness, the ones that streamed across her face now came purely from grief. Leonora had never lost important to her in her life. Her parents and sister were alive and well, and all of the friends she'd met in her life had come and gone as expected. Her father's parents had died before she was born, and her mother's parents were still alive back in America. The girls she'd met at Salem had never really mattered to her much, and none of them had ever expected it anyway.
But seeing Micha walk away from her, dark pigtails falling behind her, was burned into her brain. Her heart beat furiously in her chest, though it felt like it was in her stomach, and blazed as if it were on fire. The nightmarish moment she'd feared and knew would come all that afternoon had finally come to pass. Leonora knew that she could see Micha again, if she remained a girl. She could go to their dinner date, and laugh and talk and spend time with her. Perhaps if they grew close enough, the other girl would somehow come to return her feelings someday.
But if she made that decision, then she could never show herself to Whites or Layne or any of the friends she'd made as Leon again. She couldn't go to classes, since it wasn't as if a Leonora Foster was enrolled as a student at Firefox University. Not that the teachers would even notice, probably, due to the constantly shifting students, let alone the teachers themselves, in the classes. Then, she'd have to somehow get into the common room to get her owl back, and then, somehow, she'd have to explain the situation to her parents.
Perhaps it meant she could never see her family again. Which meant that no matter which choice she made, she would lose someone. Either the family and friends she'd had and made through her entire life up until this point, or the first girl she'd ever come to love. In her mind, in that moment, both were equal.
She sat in the bathroom stall crying for a very long time. Surprisingly enough, during that entire stretch of time, nobody interrupted her. Not once did the door open and invite in a witch, named or nameless, to do her business or comb her hair or even just look at herself. Leonora was left alone in her own fears and tears. She preferred it, she told herself, because she did not want to risk getting even further attached to anyone else. Eventually, after she felt she'd cried all the tears she could cry, she stepped out of the stall and looked at herself in the mirror.
She was still that girl who looked back at her in the clothing store. Her clothes and robe were still the ones that Micha picked out, and the only thing that was missing was her smile and happy face. A sobbing, red-eyed one had replaced it. It was a combination of the two Leonoras, the one before the dark haired beauty had walked into her life, and the one after. She didn't know if it was smart to attempt to clean herself with her wand, knowing how poorly it responded to Leonora's commands compared to her male form and its true master. Instead, she just turned away from herself and walked out of the bathroom.
She had three choices. Hide out even longer somewhere, go upstairs to Gryffindor Tower and try to get her owl out, or go downstairs and get her stuff. Alternatively, she could go to Professor Bryane and try to fix herself. Leonora ruled out hiding out even longer, but going upstairs or going to Professor Bryane seemed too definite for now. She walked down to the dungeons, and a few male heads turned to look at her as she walked. Leonora didn't even so much as smile at them, and she imagined more than a few considered walking over to comfort her with her face like a beaten child.
She walked faster and averted her gaze. If they got the hint, they'd ignore her. If they didn't, she'd hex them.
Fortunately for them, the hint was received. She had no interference down to the Dungeons. She walked quietly back to the cell where she'd made the potion that had changed her this way, and stopped before she entered. She took a deep breath as more tears threatened to come. She remembered storming out of here what felt like an eternity ago, after Layne had confessed her feelings and offered to help fix her. There was a chance she was still inside, waiting for Leonora to return, waiting to scold her and insult her. Leonora had to be ready for confrontation. She had to be ready to decide her choice.
When she finally entered the cell, however, she found it empty. Empty all except for her books scattered across the floor, just as she'd left them, and her cauldron sitting propped up again. Her potion which had been poured all across the floor was gone, but a new brew stewed within the pot. Its smell reached Leonora's nose, and it was at first a harsh smell but after a moment it became a strong smell that reminded her much of her father. The realization that the new potion was probably the opposing potion to the one she'd made earlier came soon after.
Had Layne made this for her, knowing she would return? Guilt rose up in Leonora's chest once more. It seemed so out of character for the caustic Slytherin to have made this and just left it here, giving Leonora the choice. She would've predicted that if Layne genuinely wanted to help her at all, she would have made the potion, gathered as many people as she can, and led a charge all across Spain to find her and force her into going back to being Leon. If she didn't want to help her, Leonora would've expected Layne to just tell the whole school the truth. This, however, seemed to betray a different side of Layne Larkin.
They say that you cannot cage the person you love. That, like a bird, you must set them free, and should they truly love you, they will return to you of their own accord. Now, Leonora was presented with the choice of returning to Layne of her own accord, and drinking the potion, or simply flying away.
Return to Layne, the one who loved her, or fly away to Micha, the one whom she loved. Those were her options now.
She didn't think she could cry anymore, but the tears somehow came. Leonora stared down into the liquid, that same confusion and fear from the moment she was first changed rising up within her again. It would be so easy now just to drink the liquid before her and allow it to change her back. She could run up to the Common Room, change, and greet Whites and Layne when they got back. Leon could thank Layne, and maybe he'd grow to feel the same way about her as Leonora felt about Micha? She'd been sensitive enough to give him the choice, after all. And Micha, the cold but gentle beauty, would wait for Leonora every day until she finally realized that her friend had abandoned her. She'd get over it, though, wouldn't she? Whites would find his way to her heart, eventually, and Leon and Layne could keep the secret of Leonora to themselves forever.
She sniffed violently as a pain struck at her heart.
"You're really nice, Micha, and I think everybody should see that."
"I suppose, you are the only one to have said that, though."
Micha would go to the dinner date. She'd wait for Leonora to come. She'd wait for the only one to have seen how nice she was to come back to her. Leonora couldn't make Micha go through with that, not as Leon went on with his life unpunished by everyone except himself. To allow herself to just take Layne as 'consolation' and move on was even more horrible. She couldn't do it to Micha. She couldn't do it to the girl she loved.
So she kicked over the cauldron, allowing its contents to spill out just as the original one did. With her hands shaking, she lifted up her wand to point it at the mess. She had made her decision, and it was final. Leonora was here to stay.